I’ll dress up as Bozo, but I can’t promise any balloon animals.
I certainly would give it a shot, though, if it would excite and enthrall my son at a future birthday party. His milestone first will be here in no time, and there will be a few more after that where circus, sesame street and cartoon characters will be in high demand. I would dress up in a clown outfit if it produced long-lasting and giggling memories.
I want to know what Transportation Secretary Norm Mineta is doing to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the interstate system. When the highway network turned 40, then Federal Highway Administrator Rodney Slater took a cross-country trip identical to the one survived by Dwight D. Eisenhower and his U.S. Army troop back in 1919. Reliving the historic ride is the perfect idea to celebrate the half-century mark. I’m not even going to ask Mineta to wear one of those corny “Happy Birthday” cone hats. He may want to carry around one of those plastic kazoos, though. There will be spots where the ride turns a little dull.
To help Mineta on his way, I thought I would plan out the trip. It won’t exactly mirror Eisenhower’s coast-to-coast escapade, but maybe it will jar the brain just as hard when he views the current infrastructure conditions of this country.
Starting in Washington, D.C., the U.S. DOT convoy should run down to the state of Virginia, where it could tackle I-95/I-395/I-495—the Springfield Interchange—in all of its glory. This stretch of highway is what one can accomplish when enough money is in the right place. Engrave this vision in your mind, Norm, especially when you are crawling through the Great Lakes region.
Moving up I-65 through the state of Indiana is where the action, and traffic, picks up again. The interstate circle around the city of Indianapolis is always heavily involved in the movement of goods and services. The excitement peaks during the p.m. rush, so don’t miss your seat in traffic.
The trip should continue through the Chicagoland area—where an afternoon on I-80/I-94 will cramp up the brake-pedal knee and sour the mood—and down to St. Louis via I-70, where bridges over the Mississippi have one foot in the grave.
Stay on I-70 through Kansas and Colorado, where the beautiful mountains and rivers will be therapeutic to the eyes. Be sure to find your way to I-25/I-225 (T-REX). This is perhaps the best example of upgrading multiple forms of transportation.
With Utah comes I-15. Remember I-15? Seven years ago the plan was considered legendary. Now the corridor has reached capacity.
The final stretch takes the group through the now-under-construction Las Vegas area. Here roadwork is at its busiest. The final stop is in Los Angeles. Here traffic is at its busiest.
My good-will-tour calculation puts the trek at about two weeks. During the stops I think Mineta should have the following on his must-do list: Be a flagger at a work zone, operate a backhoe loader, take money at a toll plaza and talk to any highway worker and motorist you can shake hands with. And if you are really good, there is all the cake and ice cream you can eat.
