The age of social media

Likes, shares and hashtags are influencing every part of our lives

David Matthews / November 02, 2018
David Matthews

#StealingHearts

When it comes to impressing girls, a group of Milwaukee teens think they have the key.

Unfortunately, they had to steal the key, along with a few others.

The group call themselves the “Hampton Boys” and they compete with rival groups to see who can get the most girls by driving around in stolen cars.

Most of these thefts were the result of the teens wandering through neighborhoods searching for unlocked cars containing money or, best of all, car keys.

The teens had stolen four cars by the time one was recovered by police. Fingerprints on the car revealed the identity of one of the suspects, and photos posted on his Facebook page led to the others.

It seems that as part of their efforts to impress girls, the teens had posed for pictures with their stolen cars and publicly posted them on the world’s most popular social media network.

If that wasn’t dumb enough, one of the teens had all four of the stolen cars parked right outside his home.

Ladies, if these sound like the men of your dreams, contact the Milwaukee county jail for visitation hours.

#HolyGuacamole

If grand theft auto doesn’t impress your female social media followers, perhaps they’ll be more interested in trendy food.

The Internet has reached a state of Peak Avocado, with every second image on Instagram featuring avocado toast of some kind. So what better time to visit Guaclandia, America’s first bus-turned-traveling-food-museum dedicated to the love of avocadoes.

This creation of the Wholly Guacamole food company toured the nation this summer offering interactive, avocado-based experiences, avo-inspired selfie backdrops, and bottomless guacamole.

Insta-worthy photo ops, unlimited guac, and no jail time? Now that’s impressive.

#ParkingFail

Not every trending topic on social media is fun to be part of.

Just ask the hundreds of passengers who were delayed at the Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport after a man left his car idling in the drop-off lane while helping his girlfriend check in for a flight.

Within minutes of abandoning the car, someone called to report it, and the airport began shutting down the entire terminal and evacuating passengers.

The bomb squad was even called in to dismantle the car and make sure it didn’t contain explosives.

Flight delays and cancellations started adding up. Passengers began posting about important events or appointments they were missing. Airport volunteers had to bring out therapy dogs to help calm frustrated passengers while staff passed out water bottles.

All told, the incident shut down the airport terminal for four hours and caused 300 flight delays nationwide affecting thousands of passengers.

However, the man who caused the whole fiasco was merely given a parking citation with a fine of just $56.

#FishciousPrank

Salmon may not have the social media star power of the avocado, but it recently showed off its own surprising versatility when it was (allegedly) used as a tool of revenge on the mean streets of Vail, Colo.

The fishy situation began when an elderly Vail gentleman stopped to put gas in his minivan. Upon opening the gas cap, he found what appeared to be canned salmon stuffed into his gas tank.

Wait, canned salmon? How pedestrian. Is that even sold in Vail, one of America’s wealthiest small towns?

Indeed, the officer called to the scene determined that it wasn’t canned salmon contaminating the gas tank.

It was actually smoked salmon.

Further questioning revealed that the old man and his wife had been feuding with the woman living in the adjoining duplex unit over a variety of issues including loud music, parking, and a cable TV line.

When an officer questioned the neighbor, he learned that she had, in fact, served smoked salmon for dinner the previous evening. He also confirmed that there were leftovers.

However, the neighbor protested her innocence and claimed it was merely coincidence that the same seafood delicacy found its way into her neighbor’s gas tank.

The investigating officer said he didn’t believe the woman’s fish tale, but she continues to insist that it was salmon else’s fault.

About the Author

Matthews has been chronicling the unexpectedly humorous side of transportation news since 2000. The stories are all true.

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