Golden opportunity
Charles Edward Jones was convicted last month of committing one of the clumsiest bank robberies of all time.
After pulling a gun on a teller at the Wachovia Bank in Miami, Jones collected $16,000 and tried to make a swift exit. But as he stuffed his gun into his waistband while running out the door, he accidentally fired it. The bullet missed him, but he was distracted enough to step out in the street in front of a van delivering school lunches.
Jones was hit and pulled underneath the van and needed help getting out. Back on his feet, he was able to stumble to his getaway car and take off. But he left his hat, gun and two gold teeth lying in the street.
Police were able to match the DNA and track Jones to a Miami hotel where they found the $16,000 stuffed in a sock hidden in his pants. He's now facing a life sentence.
Signs of the times
Father's Day is coming up quickly. But what can you buy the dad who already has vanity plates and monogrammed mud flaps? Dreamers Inc., in Durham, N.C., has your answer: customized trailer-hitch signs.
The "PowerTale" is a lighted tow hitch cover with interchangeable graphic inserts. It fits most standard 2-in. tow hitch receivers and lights up to display the phrase or logo of your choice when the brakes or headlights are activated.
The company said sports and military signs are popular now, no doubt because the ones with unicorns and naked mermaids are all sold out.
Tips from the road
Traffic tickets can cost an arm and a leg these days. And if you ignore them, you can lose your license or ruin your credit rating.
But that doesn't mean they have to put you in debt. In many areas, tickets are forgiven if you attend traffic school. Sometimes people are able to beat the ticket in court. And some people, like Virginia Ramsey in Seattle, just pay the ticket with money they make by selling their baby on the black market.
Ramsey recently pleaded guilty to selling her four-month-old son for $2,000 so she could pay a ticket. She also bought two PlayStations and hit a casino with the rest of the money.
Mom said the decision was easy once she found out her ex-boyfriend's ex-wife wanted a child. The baby was "getting on her nerves" anyway.
Bad hair day
A policeman in India sorely in need of a girlfriend recently pulled a bus nearly 100 ft using only his foot-long ponytail.
Sailendra Nath Roy was hampered by surging crowds as he pulled the 22,000-lb bus with his hair and ultimately came up well short of the world record by 550 ft.
You might remember the 35-year-old Roy from the times he pulled a van and a jeep with his ponytail. And who could forget that time he lifted a 44-lb weight with his mustache? He's now planning another attempt at a world record by towing an airplane with his hair.
Roy explained his training method to Asian News International. "Every morning I try uprooting a tree which helps me develop my muscles," he said.
What goes around comes around
After a burglar finished robbing a house in Glenview, N.Y., recently, she realized she couldn't remember where her car was parked. Worried about her baby she had left in the car, she called the police to report it stolen.
The police were able to locate the car and the child quickly and then arrested the woman for burglary and child endangerment.
Ironically, while the woman was robbing the house, someone broke into her car and stole her purse.
Having a field day
A Belgian man's car was recently spotted on the side of the road, but the owner was nowhere in sight. He was later found in a nearby field crawling on his hands and knees eating grass.
Police say they found the man grunting like a pig as he grazed. He was taken to a hospital where his alcohol level was found to be well over the legal driving limit.
In court, the man offered a perfectly logical explanation to the judge. "I like eating grass," he said, "especially when I'm drunk. It tastes like spinach."
