Home of the free
Parents of McGovern Elementary School students in Medway, Mass., are raising a stink over Paul Trufant’s septic-sewage service.
It isn’t Trufant’s line of work that parents are upset with, it’s his company trucks. Specifically, they object to the questionable slogan painted on the back of each one: “S—t happens.”
Trufant, a 40-year firefighter, said the slogan is a well-known saying and has been around forever. In fact, he’s had it painted on his trucks for the past 15 years and until now, no one ever complained.
Parents say they want Trufant to get the “S—t” off his truck before their kids see it and start repeating it. But Trufant doesn’t see the problem.
“This is America, not Iraq,” he delicately explained to the Boston Herald. “Why aren’t [parents] more worried about pedophiles?”
Put that thing away
Residents of Germantown, Tenn., really know how to ring in the new year.
Police in the suburban Memphis town were recently sent to pick up a man who was standing in the middle of the street firing a revolver. When they arrived, they discovered that the man also was naked.
With temperatures in the 40s, the naked man was grabbing at passing vehicle door handles and randomly shooting at moving traffic.
Once police were able to take him into custody, they noticed an injury on his foot sustained when he exited his home. Instead of walking out the front door, the man apparently jumped out of a second-story window.
Police suspect that some leftover Christmas spirits were probably to blame.
Bite the hand that feeds
A taxi driver in Denmark bit off more than he could chew recently when he denied fare to a group of men.
The incident began when the driver was hailed down by the group of five. He told them that only four could fit in his cab, but the men insisted that they all ride together.
Words were exchanged, someone spit at someone else and soon the driver had a pier-six brawl on his hands.
In the midst of the melee, one of the men claimed that the tip of his ring finger was bitten off by the driver. The driver said that this was an accident. Nonetheless, the rematch is already being promoted by Don King.
The naked truth
Fans headed to Tampa Bay Buccaneers football games this season didn’t have to wait for the game to start to check out tight ends.
Tampa, Fla., police discovered that three men had converted a 40-ft motor home into a mobile strip club and were operating outside the Buccaneers’ stadium for most of the season.
After paying a $20 cover, fans were served drinks and allowed to relax aboard the “party bus.” Six women were on hand to perform, charging $20 to $40 depending on whether they danced topless or Buc-naked.
Undercover officers raided the motor home and charged the three men and all of the dancers with various misdemeanors. Of course, their attorney didn’t think that was fair. After all, as the old adage says, “What goes on in a party bus should stay on the party bus.”